Marriage Fat

A couple women mentioned that since they met their husbands, they put on a few pounds AFTER the wedding. I totally get it. The wedding photos are a huge incentive to say "No!" to cupcakes... but like Nicole says, "Unfortunately, I can't really get married every other year to keep that threat of not fitting in the dress in mind." And Sarah @ See Sarah Eat admits, "I got up to my highest weight ever the year following my wedding. So, yeah it is true."

Are you doomed to get fat if you get married?

I've never been married and I used to have a bucket full of issues with the idea of marriage.  One of those issues involved associating wedding vows with a bulging belly (and I don't mean the kind with a bouncy baby inside). It was NOT something I wanted especially with a career in fitness. Now, is that REALITY? Of course not. Not everyone who says "I do" also says "seconds, please!" Hell, you don't have to have another helping as you age to see the numbers on the scale creep up. That's just part of the fun of getting older! (I hope you note my sarcasm here.)

No, I unfairly judged the institution of marriage instead of the lifestyle choices that changed a bit when the women I knew got married. And apparently, I also had a selective memory because I do know several women who have gotten in better shape since they've been married. My sister-in-law looks awesome over ten years after the wedding and three kids later. And both her married sisters have gotten in better shape after getting married and having kids, too. (Congrats to YOU, ladies!!!) But I will say this... a slimmer waistline does not happen by accident.

So, what is the secret? From my years as a fitness coach as well as an observant sister-in-law, I see that the key is planning. A perfect workout time slot is not going to magically present itself in your busy day. Healthy snacks won't just appear at your desk or in your car when a hunger craving tries to derail your weight loss efforts. Just because your sweetheart can eat a huge steak, mashed potatoes with gravy, drink a goblet of soda and have a decadent dessert without self-loathing doesn't mean your body will react the same way (and I doubt he will feel very good eating like that for too long, either).

Studies show that those who keep the weight off have the most success with a morning workout ritual. Do you have one? Do you want one? Are you pushing aside some activity so you can have some quality time with your honey? If you need a little incentive (besides avoiding extra body fat), let me just say that MOST men get more frisky after an exercise session. Just sayin'...

Any other planning ideas that have worked... or NOT worked... for you in the past? I'm definitely taking notes here... because like I said, I USED to have issues with marriage, but I've worked through most of them. I'm actually looking forward to that possibility now.

Health & Happiness,
~Zen

Holiday Binging - one day or four?

I don't know about you, but when a holiday is coming up and I'm in a relationship, I rarely stick to the idea that it's just a one-day celebration. Take this weekend, for instance. It's Labor Day this Monday... but we refer to it as "Labor Day Weekend." Most people I know are getting off work a little early today (Friday) and are planning on thoroughly enjoying themselves from Happy Hour tonight to when they collapse from BBQ overload on Monday evening. 

See if this scenario sounds familiar to you...

Wake up Friday morning to get ready for work.... but you may have stayed up a little late last night because you know that it will be an "easy" day because it's a holiday weekend. You may even treat yourself to a little frothy, mocha, latte, frapafataccino with whipped cream, caramel and fudge laced over the top.... because, hey, let's hang with the co-workers since it's bullsh*t that you're still in the office when you should have already gotten on the road to avoid holiday traffic. That coffee drink break is a both a little treat to start the celebration as well as a slightly rebellious symbol of freedom because "you're an adult and you can eat whatever you want, dammit!" And you're excited to get home and finally RELAX and enjoy your quality time with your sweetheart.

It's not even noon yet and a few bad habits are starting:
1. Not enough sleep makes you crave more calories (and caffeine) to compensate for being tired.
2. The celebration begins even though the "holiday" isn't until Monday.
3. You're using food as a reward and compensation instead of fuel... not a very healthy association that can backfire over weeks and months of "treating yourself".
4. You're setting up the context of the entire weekend with the first "meal" of the day... so you will be more inclined to say, "Screw it! I'm on vacation!" for the rest of the weekend.

Let me ask you... do you think you're MORE likely to indulge the rest of the weekend when you are hanging out with your partner? Are you MORE likely to sleep in and skip a morning workout when it's a holiday weekend and good lovin' is just a snuggle away and there's no alarm clock for three whole days? And do you have any EXTRA obligations that come with your partner's world? (Like HIS parents, siblings or friends so you can't just focus on the stuff you'd like to do?)

That's all I'm saying. It's not that love isn't FABULOUS. It's just that it's so much easier to push your healthy commitments aside when you want to celebrate. And I always feel like celebrating MORE when I'm in love... and there always seems to be more people to see and things to do when I'm in a relationship.

When I'm totally single, I can go to my brother's for the BBQ on Monday but the weekend can be spent sleeping in (and really SLEEPING!) and I can get in a leisurely workout or a hike and not be rushed. Plus, if I indulge on Friday morning with some kind of treat, I can get back on track easier when I only have to worry about MY meals and MY entertainment for rest of the weekend.

So, how do you fix it? For me, awareness is key. Notice when you decide to stay at home instead of go dancing. Notice when you skip healthy activities because you want to cuddle instead. Notice when you 'celebrate' on your own as well as WITH your partner. Splitting a dessert is a GREAT strategy when you're in love. Don't skip out on your workouts. Learn to cook a meal together with fresh veggies. And ladies, try a pole-dancing class... trust me.

Would love to hear if you AGREE or if you have found any other strategies that work for you.

Health & Happiness,
~Zen

Happy Fat

I love happy fat. You know what I'm talking about... the "let's-just-stay-home-and-get-fettucini-alfredo-and-then-lick-chocolate-gelato-off-each-other" kind of happy fat. It's awesome and I have NO JUDGMENT of you if you've enjoyed your lazy, indulgent days full of yummy goodness. For me, great food is a part of celebrating life and I embrace those sybaritic moments of hedonism.

But engage in that lifestyle for too long and you'll have a muffin top before you can say, "Nutella crepes!" (Have you tried those? omg... so awesome... )

Anyway, my point is that I totally get the food thing. I'm not the cleanest eater 100% of the time but I strive for balance. My boyfriend (tee hee... it's a new relationship so please wish me joy and luck and all that stuff) just had his birthday week (Yeah, you get a birthday week! Did you know that?) and we ate cake at least four times (or was it five?). 

So, you know what's on the menu this week? Veggies. Lots and lots of veggies. Right now I'm doing these artichokes in the slow cooker with just lemon, garlic and tons of Italian seasoning. When they're finished cooking, I will dribble a little olive oil on them and sprinkle some Parmesan on top. Seriously delicious with a little bit of healthy oil, tons of fiber and chock full of nutrients. Plus they take a while to eat so you can't scarf down too much before you start feeling full. Have you ever tried one? If you haven't, they're pretty fun and unique to eat. You scrape the soft edge of the leaves over your teeth and discard the rest on a plate... then you chop off the pointy stuff in the middle (the choke) and eat the soft artichoke heart underneath it.

So, that's how I maintain some balance after the happy fat attempts to make another appearance. Heck, even Michelle Obama admitted in a recent online chat that she and her husband gained weight when they first got married. (Yeah, go Barack!) Of course, she attributed it to being two busy working professionals but I've got my own theories. And the First Lady's answer to their weight gain struggle was (drum roll please....) to cook one meal a week at home and drink more water. Anyway... how about you? Any great recipes you'd like to share? How about "new love" stories? I love those :)

Health & Happiness,
~Zen

Love Makes You Fat

Love makes you fat! I recognize that my declaration upsets people... but I've got PROOF now!

As a fitness professional and serial monogamist, I have noticed some trends over the years not only in MY body but in my clients' bodies as well. I'm here to talk about it and, more importantly, discuss what can be DONE about it.

Your relationship DOES affect your body weight... especially if you 're a woman.

Have you noticed some weight creep since you moved in with your loved one? I bet you have.

This blog is dedicated to the sharing of stories, struggles, strategies and successes of those of us who want to KEEP the love... but lose the love handles.

I'm looking forward to helping you (and myself) find that balance.

Health & Happiness,
~Zen